#64 Bringing Baby Home: How to Build a Strong Bond After Surrogacy with Jaquie Dason

You’ve waited, hoped, and dreamed—and now your baby is coming home. But what happens next?

In this episode, Dr. Alyssa Small Layne sits down with postpartum coach and doula Jaquie Dason to talk about the emotional, physical, and mental transition that happens after surrogacy. From bonding fears and sleep anxiety to preparing your home (and heart) for life with a newborn, Jaquie shares the practical tools and emotional truths every intended parent should know—especially those feeling nervous, unsure, or overwhelmed by the “what now?”

Jaquie also shares her own unique connection to the surrogacy world—she was born through traditional surrogacy herself—and what that means for the way she supports families today.

What You’ll Learn:

• 00:50 — Why bonding fears are normal for parents through surrogacy

• 02:28 — What postpartum advice isn’t being passed down anymore

• 04:13 — Safe sleep myths from older generations (and how to update them)

• 06:17 — Why surrogacy parents may struggle more with sleep loss

• 08:07 — Creating a surrogacy-specific parenting course

• 09:31 — How to build secure attachment even without pregnancy

• 11:15 — What “secure attachment” means—and how to create it

• 13:06 — Understanding newborn cues: hunger, overstimulation, and more

• 14:07 — Dunstan Baby Language and how sounds reveal baby needs

• 15:08 — Why confidence grows when you understand your baby

• 17:27 — Why instinct alone isn’t enough—you need tools

• 19:01 — The #1 thing parents over-prepare for (hint: it’s not knowledge)

• 21:06 — Jaquie’s birth story as a child of traditional surrogacy

• 23:51 — On bonding without breastfeeding: “My mom didn’t, and we were incredibly close”

• 26:33 — What it felt like to meet her birth mom

• 30:40 — How to talk to your child about their surrogacy story

• 32:23 — The best book for toddlers learning how babies are made

• 33:50 — Why traditional surrogacy still deserves clarity and respect

• 34:44 — The truth about spoiling your newborn (you can’t!)

• 35:43 — Sleep strategies that work—within 24-hour cycles

• 36:39 — How to ask for help (and why you absolutely should)

• 37:42 — Final advice for anxious intended parents preparing to bring home baby
  

Resources Mentioned:

• Surrogacy Step-By-Step Guide
• BloomBridge Surrogacy App

Jaquie Dason

• https://www.postpartumcoaching.ca

• Instagram: @jaquiepostpartumcoach

• What makes a baby - Book
  

Key Takeaways:

• Secure attachment is created through compassion, response, and connection—not pregnancy

• Bonding is possible and powerful, no matter how your baby arrives

• Tools like newborn cue recognition and postpartum support reduce fear and increase confidence

• You don’t have to do this alone—and you were never meant to
  

If you're preparing to bring home your baby, give yourself permission to get support. Explore Jaquie’s surrogacy-specific parenting course. Use BloomBridge to build your fourth-trimester toolkit.

“You can’t spoil a newborn. They need love, holding, and support—just like you do.”